Jury Duty

A couple of weeks ago I opened my mailbox and found this very odd and strange looking letter. I skimmed right over it at first and as I was pilfering through the other mail I notice the bright red letters.

"Report for jury duty".

What?! Oh dears!

Mom was with me and I immediately said over and over, "Mom, I can't do this. I can't do this. I won't do this. I won't do this".

In between laughter and hysteria I tried to realize it was my civic duty. I should be a proud American citizen. It's patriotic to be summoned, right? Well, if you take a good look at my chin right now, it's broke out in pimples from stress. I don't feel very patriotic.

I woke up this morning, THE morning, to report. Stomach in knots and a trip to the bathroom later and I was off. I was nervous for a few reasons. First, I don't particularly like new things. I want to know all the details about a situation before I go in. And for this, I had nothing. I had a time and I place and that was it. Second, what about the girls? Brandon is swamped at work and all my friends have young kids too; who in the world is going to pick them up from school if I'm stuck in a courthouse? I was afraid of all sorts of little things.

Thankfully, Brandon's best friend was also summoned so there was a familiar face in the room with me. If there was an emergency, I wasn't alone. But then something I wasn't expecting happened. When the circuit judges walked out, I knew two of them! What?!

I had myself a quiet chuckle to myself for freaking out and listened to the rules and watched the orientation video. Before we were finished for the day I approached the judge and stated my reasons for excusal -- stay at home mom, in Bible study core group with one of the judges -- but he didn't excuse me. He was super friendly and told me to stick with them and we'd work things out.

I know to some people being nervous about jury duty sounds silly. But to me, it was dreadful. All of the unknowns freak me out. And I'm still not finished with my duty. I must serve for the next three months. This is going to be exhausting. But this is what I'm going to cling to...

"For God has not given us a spirit of fearfulness, but of power, love, and sound judgement". 2 Timothy 1:7

When I pick up the phone to call in next month, I will not be afraid.

When I report to the courthouse, I will not be afraid.

When I'm not personally able to pick up the girls from school, I will not be afraid.

Because He is with me. Even in jury duty.

9/11

I woke up late that morning. Late, being sometime after 8 a.m. The girls had decided to sleep in and that, thankfully, gave me a few extra moments of rest. They were nine days shy of being five months old. I had only been married a little over a month. But I will never forget that morning.

As was the custom, I walked through the tiny hallway in our apartment and went to turn on the t.v. It was time for Good Morning America and I needed my time with Charlie and Diane before the girls woke up. Still in a haze I clicked the power button on the remote and turned to the kitchen. It took a few minutes before I realized the voice I was hearing wasn't Charlie or Diane, but it was Peter.

Peter? Peter Jennings in the early morning? That couldn't be right. Could it?

I proceeded preparing my toast and I'm sure I grabbed a caffeinated drink. Most definitely soda, not coffee. It wasn't until I saw the t.v. did I realize what was going on. Though, I know I wasn't able to fully comprehend it, because it's still hard for me to wrap my head around it even today.

I watched the coverage of the twin towers with my mouth wide open. I cried. And I was afraid. Did this really just happen? I sat on my couch all day. I could not turn away from the coverage. I called my sister in Baltimore because there was a World Trade Center there. I called Brandon numerous times during the day for reassurance.

I'm not sure how I took care of the girls that day. I think I was in robot mode. I had enough sense, though, to take a picture of them that day. I knew one day I would have to talk about what happened that September morning because our country would not be the same again.

For us, it was pretty easy to move on with our lives. Brandon works in the aviation business and his company took a hit. We knew at any time he could be laid off. But praise God for his provision! We live in a military town now, just a few miles from an Air Force base. Many of the girls' classmates have mothers or fathers that have served or are serving in Iraq. We have C-130's flying overhead night and day. It's a constant reminder for us to never take living here in America for granted.

Stuck

I am in a rut.

I've reached that point again where I don't want to blog anymore.

But I do want to blog.

I want to document our days and remember the silly stories.

But I kind of want to retreat to the old fashion journal. You know, pen and paper?

Oh, what to do, what to do...